Andrew John

How I Come To Be

My parents came with the rest In the 60's rush to be the best
They were fooled - It was cold and desolate
I was around pretty soon, I kept my head down payed my dues
My brothers were in there too - all of us sharing in one bed

But it aint right
Asking me to loose the fight
When I did not want to be like you anyway
No it aint right
You look at me, your scared at night
When it's you who's doin' me wrong just the same

That's how I come to be

At the school the scene was wack too many rules plus I'm black
So you teachers - tried to break me like a bucking mule
Everyday yeah, I tried to learn I got so mad you know my people burn, burn
No history lesson ever showed me that just you

But it aint right
Asking me to loose the fight
When I did not want to be like you anyway
No it aint right
You look at me, your scared at night
When it's you who's doin' me wrong just the same

That's how I come to be

Holding it down
I'm holding it down
Your holding me down
I gotta get down
Break you down
All the way down

Old Bad Habits

Oh the plight
Oh the plight
They try as hard as they might
But with every new day brings a fight
To break old bad habits

T'was so sad to see
The baby in me
The lady in me
Break down and cry

T'was so sad to see
The lover in me
The mother in me
Flyin' sky high

Oh the plight
Oh the plight
They try as hard as they might
But with every new day brings a fight
To break old bad habits

Too many you see have lived in poverty
This their only security and try to console their grief
Oh so many you see running the streets as free
This is their totality living the life of a common theif

T'was so sad to see
The baby in me
The lady in me
Just want to cry

T'was so sad to see
The lover in me
The mother in me
Just want to get high

Oh the plight
Oh the plight
They try as hard as they might
But with every new day brings a fight
To break old bad habits

We gotta break these bad habits

If you want the children
If you want the children to get away
The children
They all were children

Oh t'was so sad to see the baby in me or the lady in me
Just get down on her knees to try
Just get down on her knees to cry
Just get down on her knees  to die

Why?

Perpetual Blues

Say a prayer for me if you can
The hound squad were after me and I ran
Say a prayer for me if you can
The hound squad were after me and I ran

Accused, abused
Which way to chose
Perpetual blues?
Perpetual blues?

Say a prayer for me if you can
No more space can I find within my own mind
Feel so trapped, trapped within
Lord I go home I aint doin' no sin

But keep it to the straight and narrow
Please don't ruin my tomorrow
Leave me alone
Oh I sing in my home

Perpetual blues
Perpetual blues
It aint no news
Singing perpetual blues

Say a prayer for me if you can
Dare I slow down to your pace
I think I just might find a resting place
If I slow down to your pace you'll get me

Accused, abused
Which way to chose
Perpetual blues?
Perpetual blues?

But keep it to the straight and narrow
Don't ruin my tomorrow
Oh lord in my home I keep it all down
I rise in the middle of the night
Say I don't wanna fight (it aint no use)

Perpetual blues
Perpetual blues
It aint no news
Singing perpetual blues

Sticks and stones may break your bones but words can never hurt me... really tho'?

It's been a while since I layed a rap on y'all but check it out! It just occured to me whilst doing the washing up less than 10 minutes ago (It's now 22.34 hrs) but it was definately before putting out the trash which was about 5 mins ago. Isn't it strange (weird and wonderful as my old electronics lecturer would say as we went over the detailed insides of a transistor radio?) how some words that seem very similar infact almost identical in spelling and syllable structure can have nothing to do with each other at all! Yes weird and wonderful indeed considering that I am currently studying Spanish and come across countless instances such as this but then again that's two different languages Spanish and English! So ¿por qué la confusión en esta lengua inglesa?

Well two words that came to my mind about 15 minutes ago were Ingenious and Ingenuous. I first came across the the second of the two words - that is the word intrigued me to find out what it meant - this was about 15 years ago. It was a book called Crosstown Traffic (Jimi Hendrix and post-war pop) written by Charles Shaar Murray. Anyway here's what the words mean - check it out!

in·gen·ious    ( P )  Pronunciation Key  (n-jnys)
adj.
1.Marked by inventive skill and imagination.
2.Having or arising from an inventive or cunning mind; clever: an ingenious scheme. See Synonyms at clever.
3.Obsolete. Having genius; brilliant.

ingenious

\In*gen"ious\, a. [L. ingeniosus, fr. ingenium innate or natural quality, natural capacity, genius: cf. F. ing['e]nieux. See Engine.]

1. Possessed of genius, or the faculty of invention; skillful or promp to invent; having an aptitude to contrive, or to form new combinations; as, an ingenious author, mechanic.

A man . . . very wise and ingenious in feats of war. --Hakluyt.

Thou, king, send out For torturers ingenious. --Shak.

The more ingenious men are, the more apt are they to trouble themselves. --Sir W. Temple.

2. Proseeding from, pertaining to, or characterized by, genius or ingenuity; of curious design, structure, or mechanism; as, an ingenious model, or machine; an ingenious scheme, contrivance, etc.

Thus men go wrong with an ingenious skill. --Cowper.

3. Witty; shrewd; adroit; keen; sagacious; as, an ingenious reply.

4. Mental; intellectual. [Obs.]

A course of learning and ingenious studies. --Shak.

Source: Webster's Revised Unabridged Dictionary, © 1996, 1998 MICRA, Inc.

AND NOW HERE COMES THE CHALLENGER - thus.

in·gen·u·ous    ( P )  Pronunciation Key  (n-jny-s)
adj.
1.Lacking in cunning, guile, or worldliness; artless.
2.Openly straightforward or frank; candid. See Synonyms at naive.
3.Obsolete. Ingenious.

In*gen"u*ous\, a. [L. ingenuus inborn, innate, freeborn, noble, frank; pref. in- in + the root of gignere to beget. See Genius, and cf. Ingenious.]

1. Of honorable extraction; freeborn; noble; as, ingenuous blood of birth.

2. Noble; generous; magnanimous; honorable; upright; high-minded; as, an ingenuous ardor or zeal.

If an ingenuous detestation of falsehood be but carefully and early instilled, that is the true and genuine method to obviate dishonesty. --Locke.

3. Free from reserve, disguise, equivocation, or dissimulation; open; frank; as, an ingenuous man; an ingenuous declaration, confession, etc.

Sensible in myself . . . what a burden it is for me, who would be ingenuous, to be loaded with courtesies which he hath not the least hope to requite or deserve. --Fuller.

4. Ingenious. [Obs.] --Shak.

Note: (Formerly) printers did not discriminate between . . . ingenuous and ingenious, and these words were used or rather printed interchangeably almost to the beginning of the eighteenth century. --G. P. Marsh.

Syn: Open; frank; unreserved; artless; plain; sincere; candid; fair; noble; generous.

Usage: Ingenuous, Open, Frank. One who is open speaks out at once what is uppermost in his mind; one who is frank does it from a natural boldness, or dislike of self-restraint; one who is ingenuous is actuated by a native simplicity and artlessness, which make him willing to confess faults, and make known his sentiments without reserve. See Candid.

Source: Webster's Revised Unabridged Dictionary, © 1996, 1998 MICRA, Inc.

You see they are rather similar? But wait a minute in my opening statement I said "how some words that seem very similar infact almost identical in spelling and syllable structure can have nothing to do with each other at all! Yes, weird? Well in this case not weird at all because in highlighting this example I have infact (and this is the honest truth) during the course of writing this diatribe and enacting out this soliloquy come to realise that the word I was looking for was infact DISINGENUOUS - I will leave you to find out what that word means? Something tells me it's not gonna be nice.............. Damn I couldn't help myself so here it is and which one was I on this occasion? Ingenious, Ingenuous or Disingenuous?

dis·in·gen·u·ous    ( P )  Pronunciation Key  (dsn-jny-s)
adj.
1.Not straightforward or candid; insincere or calculating: "an ambitious, disingenuous, philistine, and hypocritical operator, who... exemplified... the most disagreeable traits of his time" (David Cannadine).
2.Pretending to be unaware or unsophisticated; faux-naïf.
3.Usage Problem. Unaware or uninformed; naive.

Usage Note: The meaning of disingenuous has been shifting about lately, as if people are unsure of its proper meaning. Generally, it means "insincere" and often seems to be a synonym of cynical or calculating. Not surprisingly, the word is used often in political contexts, as in It is both insensitive and disingenuous for the White House to describe its aid package and the proposal to eliminate the federal payment as "tough love." This use of the word is accepted by 94 percent of the Usage Panel. Most Panelists also accept the extended meaning relating to less reproachable behavior. Fully 88 percent accept disingenuous with the meaning "playfully insincere, faux-naïf," as in the example "I don't have a clue about late Beethoven!" he said. The remark seemed disingenuous, coming from one of the world's foremost concert pianists. Sometimes disingenuous is used as a synonym for naive, as if the dis- prefix functioned as an intensive (as it does in certain words like disannul) rather than as a negative element. This usage does not find much admiration among Panelists, however. Seventy-five percent do not accept it in the phrase a disingenuous tourist who falls prey to stereotypical con artists.

It's getting kinda late...

Stone, Tuesday 16.03.04, 23.12 hrs

Words and phrases that I say a hell of a lot but I don't have a problem with

Get In Where You Fit In

I Can't Strain My Brain (I always say this one in my head and not to people for obvious reasons. It's the title of a Sly Stone song from the 1974 album Small Talk - check it out)

Obviously

Chill Out

Mine's A Guiness (Ha ha ha)

Stone, Wednesday 17.3.04, 22.36 hrs

I composed the following 2 ideologies whilst looking at an MRI brain scan sitting in the dark at my workstation. The time was approx 13.46 hrs. The location was the Institute of Neurology, University College London, Queen Square.

Beauty

Perfection. What is perfection? It's not me that's for sure. I am not - repeat I am not a perfectionist. An elitist maybe but never a perfectionist. I have very high standards - true.But I also possess and retain a certain frailty and am known for the "error of my ways".

I believe there is more beauty to be found in a failed masterpiece than in mathermatics! There is real beauty in a gapped tooth smile, a sculptured head full of natty dreadlocks, a dirty laugh or even Broken English... if you look for it?

The elitist in me does not strive for 100% of anything other than effort, belief and intelligence! But yet at any one time you could see me put in no more than say 75% of what you might be looking for? That's my beauty and yes beauty is in the eye of the beholder. Check it out - but within that 75% of what you were lookin for I have put in 100% of my totality at that particular point in time.

That 25% that you sincerly believe that I have witheld or just not given.... that my friend, that belongs to you. I am not the perfectionist - I am a work of art with all it's rough edges in full view.

Stone, Thursday, 18/3/04, 22.30 hrs

To be one or not to be two?

I prefer the number 2 to the number 1. That way I'm always motivated and have something to strive for? No, not número uno but a more caring and exceptional approach to life! In other words your enemy could be your friend and rules are made to be broken - well I make the rules! I create music, I play the bass and I believe in what I choose to believe in. For all you know the numbers 2,3,4 and 5 could be just as good as any No.1 and in most cases probably are.

No, your order of society nor your numbering systems DO NOT represent me 1 bit!

Stone, Thursday, 18/3/04, 22.55 hrs.

Some might cry misogyny when they read the following text. But to be fair, all that glitters is not gold and not all women are upfront and honest enough in their reasoning to explain some of their more nauseous behaviours towards some men. I wrote these words back in 1994 as part of a song I co-wrote called "Hardcore Old Skool Preacher a.k.a. Ike's Rap".

A little bit of female lust a.k.a. Insincerity, I was drunk, I was feeling down.

Up close she said I was the most

Kinda like a star - she fancied my GUITAR!

But from afar she wanna be a fan

I said mess wid me YOU'LL wind up in my Band

Where work is hard - you gotta pay your dues

Fuck around I'll have you singing the Blues

Like Ike Turner I don't play or joke

When night-time comes you gotta make my bed your own

Cos I'm a hardcore oldskool preacher

Never went to school and I never had no teacher

But I can show you a thing or two

First things first I wanna get into you

Stone, Thursday, 1.4.04, 22.49 hrs

Plastic Consumption Junction

What's in the words you refuse to share talk to the hand is that all your own hair?

Oh yes, oh yes we really love you your work we mean there's none above you

Polite to the point of boiling over simmering pots of gold and clover

Walking on water has been done before so you walk on shit to even the score

Honed to the bone muscles built like terrordomes as I break down ignorance words of president Stone

My facility is remarkable your stability is laughable turning the tables to tilt tantalisingly towards tantrums

My inner prism sanctum sanctions sandwiches some drip with anger some garnished with bandages

Blood is my only commodity so suck me dry - now for my blood it's my turn to cry

In to your beaker transform my no name sneakers global warning your heaters

With the fat of the land slide your victory triumphant fanfare to the suckers drumroll to the lovers

Creating another monster baby boy not frankenstein more like spaceships ahoy!

Bones ache the captain is second rate villians seem totaly fake

So give me my punishment - to the dungeons with me

Just give me an alien lifeform - female but in touch with my needs

Resistence is futile inflicting your will is juvenille

So harmonise my profile  - make youself useful and airbrush my smile!

Stone, Thursday, 29.4.04, 22:55 hrs

Power To The People Who Were All Created Equal

Ritualistic bombastic spastic

Break em like matchsticks

Braindead so patch this

Programmable language

Technophobe frantic

21st century romantic

Turn it over spank it

Feel good? now wa_k it

Don't stamp it, don't cramp it

Thank it, thank it

Vamp it like funk

Bandit like punks

Donald like trump but ducks are better?

Red letter, black marks, black days, black stains, black veins

Blue blood, black hearts, black lists, black lash, black cash - dirty money?

Black to the future, black to basics, on this black bored!

Blackman and robin, weaving and bobbing

Ducking and diving, thuggin' and a buggin'

Drunk and disorderly, high as a kite, pissed and broke

Thick as these - times that we live in

Never give up - never give in!

Afracadabra, Star Cigar, Inner Prism, Yinka da Thinker, 7th Son, Spasm Band.

Stone, Wednesday, 26.05.04, 21.41 hrs

Hall Dat Jazz

Dropping the melodies, personalities made out of jazzmatic tensions.

Comprehension of an artform, often transformed da giant steps dey took

No question? ask Miles Davis, if he could answer he'd tell ya straight no chaser

Keeping music still was a waster - time, so he kept he's juice moving all da while

Innovating, invigorating, ever changing - outspoken too - he left the purists feeling kinda blue

True, Coltrane soared like a plane out of control, people said he might even be insane

It was a frame up da way da critics critisised, categorised him

Back 'n' da day it was a shame up, da way he played his horn, tenor madness

Sheets of sound bounced off da ground to leave frail hearts a pounding

Sounding light years ahead of time he fell in his prime - a love supreme

The ultimate dream of man and instrument uniting - da struggle of a music man fighting

In dis bitch of a life Stanley Clarke had da spark to improvise

Recognise dis man was phenomenal, his bass guitar was astronomical

Playing some serious notes he provoked da quotes of prodigy

Like before him Charlie Parker's ornithology

A beast of the alto saxophone - he too was prone to the stigmatizing effects

Of an intolerant society, so his light burned brightly, all too briefly

Another casualty - genius immortality in da eyes of later generations

Don't stop and was to be-bop what the old skool rappers was to hip-hop

Pioneers, revolutionaries, in da darkest hall of fame ever more unquestionably

Hall dat jazz, hall dat jazz, hall dat jazz..... hall dat jazz.

Stone, Tuesday, 15.06.04, 23.23 hrs

THOSE WHO TELL DON'T KNOW.... THOSE WHO KNOW DON'T TELL....

El sabio no dice lo que sabe, y el necio no sabe lo que dice.

Stone, Friday, 02.07.04, 16:40 hrs

You cried recently
I died decently
I tried terribly
I lied frequently
I hide secretly
I fight cleverly
I speak secondly
I agree cynically
I laugh sarcastically
I trust cautiously
I care commpassionately
I crush horribly
I mistake nobody
I work economically
I live finitely
Your intelligence teaches me
Your sexual femininity
Your body teases me
Your soul tortures me
Your being pleases me
Your subordinance frightens me
My mantra repeatedly
Find me...
Greet me...
Leave me...
Immortality

Stone, Monday, 25.10.04, 20:50 hrs

The rabbit hutch was the pinnacle
The zenith, the apogee, utopia to my cynnical
The rabbit hutch was serene
Calm as night and twisted like a dream
The rabbit hutch had its problems
Could never sleep could never solve them
The rabbit hutch knew nothing of leisure
Destroying spare moments prohibiting pleasure
The rabbit hutch was hard on discipline
comments screamed only once required perfect listening
The rabbit hutch was well versed in procrastination
My way or the highway controlled it's frustrations
The rabbit hutch was meant to be a solution
To combat fear, anxiery and destitution
The rabbit hutch became a circus
A good time had by all but nobody heard of us
The rabbit hutch was idyllic
For old age pensioners and god fearing clerics
The rabbit hutch demanded power
To dictate, orchestrate and ultimately devour
The rabbit hutch was a thief
Stealing many years and causing many grief
The rabbit hutch was diseased
Ill-advised, without conception, ill at ease
The rabbit hutch was socially stunted
Trusted no-one and often easilly affronted
The rabbit hutch was inhumane
To sentinent beings who campaigned in vain
The rabbit hutch was a complete abstaction
An illogical self manifistation and impractical
The rabbit hutch put me in a zone
Old before my time, still some called it home
Uncomprimising like evolution
The rabbit hutch never understood my resolution
A thorn in it's side, a stick in the mud
A dissenting voice in everyone of us

Stone, Saturday 18.11.06 17.00 hrs